Author: B Loom
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Steve Witkoff’s Business Ties to Russia?
Steve Witkoff’s business dealings include partnerships with Russia-linked billionaire Len Blavatnik and past ties to a Russian mobster. See what’s confirmed.
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Pope Trump the First? Internet Implodes After Truth Social Post
Trump posts AI image of himself as pope, sparking global outrage and memes. Critics call it disrespectful. Trump calls it “tremendous robes.”
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Tofu Cat Litter Trend
AUSTIN, TX – A trending eco-friendly cat litter made from tofu by-products has created unprecedented chaos in households across America as cats are now unable or unwilling to tell the difference between their bathroom facilities and their owners’ dinner plates.
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Mushroom Gummy Phenomena
A groundbreaking study from the Center for Nutritional Absurdity has found that consumers of the trending mushroom gummies are developing an unexpected side effect: the ability to communicate telepathically with common yard mushrooms.
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VR Metaverse Phenomenon
Man Lives in VR Metaverse for Month, Returns to Find Plants Thriving Without Him SEATTLE, WA – After spending 30 consecutive days fully immersed in a virtual reality metaverse, local tech enthusiast Marcus Wellington returned to the physical world only to discover his neglected houseplants were doing better than ever. Wellington, a 34-year-old software developer,…
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AI Fashion Trends
NEW YORK, NY – The fashion world was left both confused and captivated yesterday when AI designer “FashionByte” unveiled its Spring 2025 collection consisting entirely of garments inspired by bread emojis.
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Pickleball Sensation
BOISE, ID – America’s fastest-growing sport has caused an unexpected grocery crisis as thousands of new pickleball players have mistakenly purchased actual pickles instead of proper equipment.
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JD Vance’s Arctic Recon Ruined by Rogue Portaloo and Hotel Fail
Senator JD Vance’s Greenland mission hits the skids after a surprise portaloo ordeal and zero hotel rooms. Arctic chill, zero thrill.
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Trump Officials Use Signal to Plan War
Top Trump officials planned war via Signal, added a journalist by mistake. Experts recommend WhatsApp, Telegram, or maybe yelling out the window instead.
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Police Launch Urinevestigation
Avon & Somerset Police are investigating after an officer was filmed urinating on a dead cat’s grave. Sources say the case is “leaking sensitive details.”